Laid to Rest (2009) - Robert Hall

Laid to Rest is a low quality but high effort horror movie written and directed by Robert Hall. I say high effort because Director Hall had the drive and wanted to create something. The parts that succeed remind me of Hatchet but the rest suffers from the Director's inability and a low-budget.

This movie features a slasher named Chromeskull. A serial killer that wears a chrome-skull mask and specializes in brutalizing his victims. Of course he does it in the goriest ways possible. Chromeskull is in pursuit of Princess, a young woman with amnesia that woke up in a morgue. Princess (Bobbi Sue Luther) is joined by Steven (Sean Whalen) and Tucker (Kevin Gage). They serve as her protectors that aid her escape from the clutches of this malicious masked stranger whose motives are a mystery chased through the entire picture.

Chromeskull is awesome. His style is the coolest-looking thing in the movie. His mask reminds me of Marilyn Manson's album cover for Golden Age of the Grotesque. Robert Hall must have had a great time directing Chromeskull's mutilation scenes. Gore levels in this movie are off the charts. In one scene, the killer takes a knife and stabs a man through the mouth. Cheek to cheek. Right through the teeth and gums... yikes. Then rips off the dudes face! That was wonderful! The practical effects were wonderful. I even liked the CGI when it was used sparingly.

That's all the movie did well. The Director misused the computer graphics when he put cheap splatter effects in. I saw that CGI blood and lost it. Then the movie has horrendous editing that hinders a number of scenes. Sometimes it's hard to tell what is happening and who is getting attacked. And the casting is weird. Why even get Lena Headey (300, Game of Thrones) when she is so inefficient.

In fact, all the characters are inefficient. It's a cliche female lead with Goldberg and Steve Buscemi’s little brother in tow. Your biggest known actor that gets a decent chunk of screen time is Sean Whalen (Frogurt from LOST). It could have been good if it were made better. The occasional stabs at comedy are okay but not enough to save it.

While the Director tried, and the movie had its moments. The poor just outweighed the good. I appreciate low-budget movies that pull themselves up by their bootstraps. But movie is not well executed. Maybe Robert Hall will get it right for the sequel. Check this out if you are looking for something to watch and you feel like seeing just about anything.

Director: Robert Green Hall

Producer: Chang Tseng and Bobbi Sue Luther

Writer: Robert Green Hall

Starring: Bobbi Sue Luther, Kevin Gage, Sean Whalen and Johnathon Schaech

Studio: Dry County Films and Anchor Bay Entertainment

Release date: March 18, 2009

Country: United States

Did ya know: When Tucker and Steven print off the information about The Girl they use a laser printer, but the sound is that of a matrix style printer.

The Human Monster (1939) - Walter Summers

Bela Lugosi turns in a fantastic performance. It is right on par with the exact same films that had made him famous like Dracula . My personal favorite being The Black Cat . Like the latter, this film suffered from poor circulation and lack of advertisement. Either that or the public wasn't interested in seeing Lugosi in anything else other than his famous bloodsucker. This film has a broad and well acted plot that was rich with detail. Lugosi has two sides in this picture. His well loved and compassionate side. The other is a strict, brutal lone shark that acts as a sinister villain to blind and handicapped people. He really brutalizes his victims. It's a macabre message to pay your bills. The film is slow moving and plagued by the usual setbacks from its time. Most of the nation wasn't really that concerned with horror at the time. But studios knew that they would always have an audience. This film is a prime example of that. It's sad because it's

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Ju-On (2000) - Takashi Shimizu

Watching Japanese horror is similar to watching British comedy. If you enjoy dry whit then you probably enjoy the boys of Monty Python in drag. That's the joke, they're dressed like women. Get it? Well, that's British humor. But if you're like most Americans you probably prefer Adam Sandler farting his way across a football field and hooking up with chicks that are way out of his league. Americans usually prefer this more in your face, crass brand of humor. My point is funny in England is different from funny in the US. The same goes for J-Horror. What the Japanese consider scary is very different from what Americans consider scary and it shows in this horror film. Japanese horror is generally slow (a little too slow sometimes), suspenseful and creepy. Ju-On is a creepy effing film. The movie has almost no soundtrack. It is incredibly suspenseful and the pay-offs are pretty awesome, but I think that it was done better in the American version (cultural t

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Inseminoid (1981) - Norman J. Warren

What can be said for mindless schlock pictures like this one. They were pumped out in droves during the eighties. Inseminoid !? give me a break! It sounds like some pre-pubescent teenage boys came up with the title. On the plus side the movie isn't horrible to look at and it has a decent amount of gore. If you can separate yourself from the political incorrectness, then you might have a perfectly decent Sci-Fi Monster Feature. A research team exploring caves on Jupiter accidentally awakens an ancient alien that rapes and impregnates one of the team members. She suffers from terrible shock and trauma, leading to a complete mental breakdown as her pregnancy accelerates faster and faster. Feeling threatened she decides to kill anyone she deems a threat. Can the rest of the research team survive or will they all become victims of INSEMINOID! Apparently this movie had a million dollar budget. That's really shocking considering the outcome of the picture. The acting

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